ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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