...so i touched it.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize