From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
