I only kidnapped one of them. chill
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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