escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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