Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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