Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
If I die, sorry about rent.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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