Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
honey bunches of taint.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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