He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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