Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
