just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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