Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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