He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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