Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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