The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
