Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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