I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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