So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
