My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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