He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
