I must be too annoying 4 u.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
