How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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