idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize