there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
