It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Non-Jews are for practice
Girls should come with a carfax report
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
