and next time when you feel me up, do it right
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
