If i come over, it means nothing
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
