butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
