I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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