The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
