to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
either way he was missing a nipple.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Randomize
