East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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