ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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