We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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