god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
