Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
