so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
