I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This house was built for laser tag.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
