Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
