I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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