I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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