Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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