I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
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