Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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