dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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