As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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