I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
