then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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