Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize