just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
it was like eating out sand paper
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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