I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Too much gin, very little bucket
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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